It was a shock. But soon our hearts went into tears for this soulful singer ever to have lived. My memories of Her are not from seeing Her but listening to Her even before I knew what and who I was listening to. Waking up to Suprabhadham was a customary in our family ( as in most ). Early in my life, “Suprabhadham” has become synonymous with MS Subbulakshmi. Her voice is eternal that it touches and lightens the toughest of the souls.
Though we have been listening to Her “Vishnu Sahasranama Namam’ every morning, two weeks ago, I bought a book to really understand the meanings of the words and to also to correct my Pronunciation. I have been wanting to do this for months, but somehow, I pulled myself into it two weeks ago and finally started it. Every day in the last two weeks, around twilight, I sat with Her cassette and the book with me, trying to hear it close and read the words exactly as She sings it. I have been spending an hour on just 5 verses, to learn exact pronunciation key and tonal pauses. I listened to each verse a dozen times repeating rewind/play with ears stuck to the speakers; I wanted to capture even Her breathing stops to make mine as close to perfect as I possibly can. On occasions, I got so engrossed in trying to find how in world She pronounced a certain word, while I couldnt even count the letters with that speed of thought! All along this experience, I was marvelled at the way She seamlessly renders the verses with God-like perfection. At dinner every day, I was telling harini about how difficult it was even to read them slowly with correct pronunciation, pause and the right emphasis much less sing them with a Godly rythm. I was telling her how unbelievably MSS has made these hymns look so easy to the listner hiding the numerous subtelities. Most of the emphasis and pauses are not coded into these hymns; besides these emphasis are extremely important without which your tongue will not be ready to say the next word in the right way at the right time. Every time I screwed up and corrected my pronunciation and emphasis, She was already way into the next verse. I kept wonderning how close to Her heart these must have been to have rendered them with extreme perfection.
In the middle of this eye-opening experience when I heard the news of Her demise, I was blown away. I kept questioning why God has dragged me so close to Her now than any other time. I probably listened to Her more than anyone else in the last few weeks, why? I couldnt find. But now I feel good that I did. I am a staunch believer that there is a reason behind everything so there will be, its just I dont know. I will continue this exercise of mine for weeks to come, but I already learnt that I am overambitious in attempting to master a perfection that was born, lived and gone with Her. Reading the meanings of the verses from the book I learnt that ‘he who recites these verses every day will be the blessed one to reach Lord Vishnu’. Perhaps, MSS will be the only one ever to recite it every single day, in past, in future, somewhere in someone’s ears.
May Her precious soul rest in peace in the holiest corner of the heaven.
Many in this lazygeek’s post share their memories of Her.
I was also pissed off when Sun TV read this news second in the headlines. Soon I was glad to see Mr.President flying down to give his salutations. Thats respect Sun TV.
